26 days remain

Wow, 26 days are all that are left between now and the proposed due date for our little girl.  There are times in our lives that God shows us some awesome things that help put things in perspective.  Just tonight I was outside with our Border Collie Salem and I looked down the street.  What I saw was something so amazing that I found myself transfixed for a good while just watching.  Tonight there was a huge storm that was rolling in.  Slow and massive the power that it contained was incredible.  For a moment, only a moment, I thought of how incredible it would be to see something like this surrounded by nothing but land.  Capturing that moment of our hopes and dreams I made the transition to all my discussions about this pending labor, and my pending fatherhood, being a storm.  Being able to see this in real time shook me in a real good way.  Finding myself at peace, I called Salem and took her inside.  Within minutes the storm hit.  The wind was howling, and the rain was falling in torrents.  The lighting was intense and creating split second shadows throughout our bedroom that had never existed.  It was exciting and relaxing all at the same time.  In due time, the storm had passed, a cool early spring breeze being all that remained.  The wind was blowing around the fantastic smell of the fresh fallen rain, filling my senses and lulling me to such a state of peace that I felt myself sinking into my bed.  As I drifted off to a peaceful sleep, it all became clear. 

My pending fatherhood is much like this storm.  It is massive, it is powerful, and it is real.  Whenever our little one decided to come grace us with her presence (and when she is damn good and ready) that storm will hit.  It will make other storms that I have weathered seem small and insignificant.  But two things hold true.  First, I will not give up my footing willingly.  I will hold my ground with all that I have, with every ounce of will and strength that God has provided me.  Second, when the storm passes, when the pelting rain stops falling, and the lighting ceases, what I will be left with is something so amazing and beautiful that I will have no choice but to slumber in peace.

I AM GOING TO BE A DAD, I am scared out of my mind, and I am finding myself less scared of the pending storm the more and more I look at the beauty of it, and the peace that will follow.