Things are always crazy!

Well, my darling daughter and I have been fighting the same cold.  I believe that I picked it up from her from a long night of cuddling when she was coughing so much that I had little choice but to hold her.  Next thing I know… yuck.  Anyway, it is that crazy time of year of figuring things out, rushing to pick things up, meeting family and just trying to have a great time, amidst the chaos. 

This year’s big realization for me is that it is more than worth breaking ones back to give your children some form of Christmas.  It is not about the number of the presents, it is about the memories that we hope they will take with them.  This year we are citing as our final break before Christmas madness infects our family.  We have a host of new traditions, as well as ones that my beloved and I are borrowing from our own childhoods, that we are looking forward to trying next year.

Over the weekend I caught my darling daughter doing something that really hit this point home for me.  She was barely awake, she hits the sleep wall all too cute and fast, and was standing in the middle of our dining room staring off into space (or so I thought).  My beloved was in the kitchen and she reached in and dimmed the lights to the dining room, and that is when it hit me.  There, in the middle of the room, was my sweet, darling daughter.  She was clutching the hand of one of her various dolls, leaving it to dangle upon the floor by her side.  Her other hand was being used to nurse her teething mouth.  Her beautiful blue eyes were half open and watery from sleep, and her nose was running ever so slightly. This entire scene was amplified by the lights cascading from the Christmas tree upon her, as she stared at it in wonder.  I melted.  I said to myself “There is no way that this can get any more amazing”, I felt the tears start to well up in the corners of my eyes.  Then, when I was still at the threshold of being able not to cry, when my heart was swollen in amazement of her amazement, she picked up her doll, held it over her shoulder and started patting the dolls back (we call this “Love the baby”).  I was done.

I look forward to the Christmas’ to come for my family.  I know it may be difficult work to keep the magic fascinating, and the story true.  But as our children grow older, I hope that there will be many moments to fill the recesses of my mind and heart much like the one from this weekend. 

So, as we are all going crazy this week, try to take a moment and remember what it was like for you as a child.  Think about the awe struck wonder that filled your hearts, the excitement, and the memories.  I know that with the way that things are for some of us, that we cannot shower our children with gifts.  That is part of the heartbreak that we all must deal with.  But, one thing that we can shower them with is the magic of Christmas.  Sometimes all they need is a doll, and a Christmas tree.

Happy holidays everyone.

I AM A CRANIO DAD, I am scared out of my mind, and these are the moments that bring peace.