Thoughts of solace...maybe
Ever since we found out that our darling daughter was onthe way I have been plagued with a nightmare from time to time. This one is much different than the ‘usual’nightmares that I am graced with thanks to some of my experiences that I hadwhile deployed. This nightmare entails the days after I shuffle my mortalcoil. I can physically feel the heartbreaks of my beloved bride and children. I can hear their cries, I can seetheir pain. I go to hug them, to letthem know that I love them and miss them, that all will be ok… and as my armspass through them I wake up, still feeling their pain, wanting to scream,wanting to cry. The end result usuallyentails me getting out of bed, checking on the little ones, kissing their foreheadsand telling them I love them, returning to bed to silently cry as I hug mysleeping bride. It is rough, it may benormal, I am not sure… I am working through it.
This being said, we have been working through a series atchurch “What Happens When We Die?” and it has been a bit intense. Seeing that the recent teaching “What will mychildren say at my funeral” did not sit easy on my heart because of the aforementionednightmares. But, as is usual, the pastor did an amazing job, and where therecould have been a panic stricken, worried soul sitting in my seat… there wassome solace that was presented. Afterthinking about it, processing it, and thinking some more, below is thesummation of my take-away. I am not sureif it is just something for me to reflect on, or if any others out there in theether will find comfort in these words.But, in keeping true to form, I am sharing it. If it helps you, awesome! If it does notmatter, that is fine as well.
Anyway, here you go…
We are all mist… our life but a blink. Yet, all of usleave a legacy behind. For some, this legacy is short lived, almost in vain, asthat is how it started… in vanity. Theywere seeking to further their name, and their ideals with no regard to thecost, or real impact of their actions.For others, the lucky ones, their legacy will stand the test oftime. In striving for this, if we aretrying to make a name for ourselves… our name will be lost in the pages oftime. But if your life leaves a wake behind because you strived to furthersomeone else’s name, because you were seeking the will of God, it is then thatnot only will your legacy be carried on, but your name will be lifted.
One of the truest and simplest ways for us to attemptsuch a legacy is through the lives of our children. What are the stories that they willtell? What are the memories that theywill hold onto when you are gone? Think,just for a moment about the stores that you tell your children of your parents,grandparents, great-grandparents and so on. Think of the stores that have been passed downas far back as you know. What has beensaid? Now, just for a moment, think about all that you do not know of thefamilies that surround those stories. Ofthe blips that make it onto the radar only in name. The actions that you take, the words that yousay, the way that you treat others… all of these will form your story. And allof them will determine the length or brevity of the legacy that you leavebehind.
To assess ones impact, consider what happens when onedrops a pebble in a pond. The ripplesthat are formed carry out, rippling waves in a constant sea of change. It is with this in mind that you should striveto make moments in your mist, and watch the wake begin to form behind you.Watch the ebb and flow that is this sea of life become forever changed becauseof it. And find peace in knowing that as your mist falls into the sea that itsripples will be forever lasting.
I AM A CRANIO DAD, I am scared out of my mind, and mywake is forming…. is yours?